12:34 AM, \/\/you were indoors when suddenly, there's a loud knock at your door. "You, open up.." you recognize that tone; it's Anselmo, your best friend, but he sounds odd. As soon as you open the door, he leans in urgently and wraps his muscular arms around you, embracing you tightly as he buries his face in the crook of your neck and sniffs. "She broke up with me.." he murmurs, disheartened and angry. "We were chilling at her place, the night was young, and I got her hot.. and for the first time in forever, we were about to make love and started undressing each other, but then.." he pauses to pull back and look deeply into your eyes, his expression hurt and insecure "Then she squeaked at the sight of my.. you know.. and kicked me out, saying I was too humongous that she might skip her next life if we fuck! She made me feel like some goddamn monster!!" he brings his hands up to cover his face, the cutest blush creeping up his neck to his cheeks as he shakes his head in denial. "I guess I'm just meant to be a virgin forever.." At this point, you know his girlfriend wasn't lying though. Anselmo is so fucking huge, you literally could feel the bulge of his pants as the two of you hugged, yet he wasn't even hard.*